


Hard Decisions

by PattRose



Category: The Sentinel
Genre: 4000 words, Angst, First Kiss, M/M, Sentinel Thursday #437, preslash
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2012-05-23
Updated: 2012-05-23
Packaged: 2017-11-05 21:07:23
Rating: Mature
Warnings: No Archive Warnings Apply
Chapters: 1
Words: 3,970
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/411026
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/PattRose/pseuds/PattRose
Summary: <blockquote class="userstuff">
              <p>Blair is dating Ms. Right until she tells Blair that she doesn’t want him to have anything to do with Jim anymore.  What will Blair do?</p>
            </blockquote>





	Hard Decisions

Hard Decisions  
By Patt

Blair had been dating Melanie for about six months. Things were going well and getting pretty serious. Blair wished that Jim and Melanie got along better, but there wasn’t much he could do about that. Jim seemed cold and unfeeling when Melanie was at the loft and Melanie acted like she hated him all the time. 

The phone rang and Blair answered, “Sandburg.”

“Hi sweetie, what about dinner at the Outback tonight? No one from the police academy or from Major Crimes for a change, just the two of us. ” Melanie asked. 

“That sounds great, Mel. I’ll pick you up at 7:00. Is that good for you?” Blair wondered. 

“Seven would be perfect, honey. I’ll see you then. I have something important to ask you during dinner. It’s going to be a perfect night.”

Blair found himself intrigued. What in the world would she have to ask him? Surely she wasn’t going to pop the question would she? Blair always felt that is where they were headed, but he wanted to do the asking when the time was right. And Blair really didn’t feel like the time was right yet. He needed to get Melanie and Jim on speaking terms before he made any big changes in his life. 

Suddenly Blair remembered that he had told Jim he was going to cook dinner that night. _Shit, I always forget something._

“Hey Jim, bad news, man. I’m taking Melanie out for dinner tonight, so I won’t be able to cook dinner here. I’m really sorry.”

“Chief, stop worrying. You can’t plan your life around me when you have someone important in your life already.”

“Hey, you’re important, too, Jim. I’m really sorry I can’t make dinner. I was going to make meatloaf.”

“Well, hell, Sandburg, why did you have to tell me that? I love your meatloaf and twice baked potatoes. It’s better than any restaurant, any day.”

“I’ll cook it on another night, I promise, all right?” Blair asked. 

“I’m holding you to that promise, Chief.”

Blair smiled at his best friend and walked into his room to get ready to take Melanie out for dinner. He missed the sad look on Jim’s face as he left the room. Blair had really stopped paying attention to Jim or Jim’s moods for quite some time.

*

Blair picked Melanie up at a little before seven and made their way over to the Outback. They were seated after about a half-hour and held hands while they looked at the menu.

“What looks good for you, Blair?”

“Jim and I always get the lamb because it’s just so delicious and tender. You should try it,” Blair suggested. 

“I want us to try something that is just for the two of us, not for you and Jim. Sometimes you make it sound like you’re a couple and that bothers me a little bit,” Melanie said. 

“I’m sorry, we’re just really close friends and sometimes I get carried away with telling people what we used to do.”

The waiter took their order for drinks and food and walked away from the table. Blair looked at Melanie and could see she was chomping at the bit to tell him something. 

“So, tell me what this big surprise is,” Blair asked. 

“You’ll never guess what I bought this last weekend,” Mel said smiling. 

“So tell me,” Blair said. 

“I got that condo I’ve wanted to get for years. It’s a three bedroom place on the beach. Do you believe it? And my next question is, would you move in with me?” Melanie asked, quickly. 

“Oh my gosh, that’s great about getting something you wanted for so long. I’m really happy for you, but I’m going to have to think about moving in with you. I’ve lived at the loft for almost five years and I consider it my home. I can’t just up and leave without giving some deep thought to all of this.”

Melanie didn’t look like a happy camper. “Blair, you teach at the police academy during the day and work on weekends with Jim at the station. I think you spend more than enough time with Jim and it might be good for you to move away from him. He’s very controlling.”

“He doesn’t control me at all, Mel. You’re behaving like a paranoid person would. Jim wants me to be happy, he would be the first one to tell you that,” Blair stated. 

“Ask him if he likes me tonight when you go home. I bet you he dances around the question and doesn’t tell you flat out if he likes me or not. I’m telling you, he doesn’t. He’s not even a little bit nice to me. You don’t seem to notice, or even care most of the time. You always worry about Jim this and Jim that. When are you going to worry about me and you?” Melanie asked. 

“I will ask him tonight and if he doesn’t give me an answer, I’ll ask him why he doesn’t like you. I can’t imagine why he wouldn’t like you. I guess I don’t understand,” Blair confessed. 

“If he doesn’t answer, will you consider believing what I tell you and move in with me?” Melanie inquired. 

“I can’t promise anything, yet, Mel. I need some time to think about all this. It’s not that easy to just give up my home.”

“So, we’ll never have a home together?” Mel asked. 

“I didn’t say that, I only said I needed time to think on all this. Just promise me you’ll give me some time,” Blair pleaded. 

“Okay, we’ll take it slower, but you have to promise to ask Jim about me tonight when you go home. I would be willing to bet money that he won’t answer you directly. He’ll dance around the question and not give you a straight answer. Honestly, Blair, I think Jim is in love with you,” Melanie pointed out. 

Blair started to laugh. “Mel, you’re sounding paranoid again. Jim is my best friend and he certainly doesn’t love me in that way.”

“You tell me what he says tomorrow and we’ll see who wins the bet.” Melanie leaned across the table and kissed Blair, but she could tell he had his mind on other things now. She realized she shouldn’t have said a word about Jim being in love with him. Now Blair was going to get all paranoid on Jim. 

The two of them talked and ate their delicious dinner, not lamb, and decided that this was going to be their favorite restaurant. Both of them loved it there and the food was always scrumptious.

*

Blair arrived home that night at 10:30 and Jim was still watching the news. Blair knew there was no time like the present, so he sat down on the sofa, next to Jim and said, “Jim could I ask you a couple of questions?”

“Chief, you know you can ask me anything.”

“What do you think of Melanie?” Blair asked point blank. 

“I think she’s a good fit for you. You seem really happy with her and I’m happy for the two of you. Why do you care what I think about you two?” Jim wondered. 

“I don’t wonder what you think of the two of us, I asked what you think of Melanie. Do you like her?” 

Jim thought for a moment and sighed. “She thinks I don’t like her?”

“She said you would dance around the question and you are. You don’t like her, do you?”

“Blair, I like her just fine. Like I said, she’s a good fit with you. I think you make a very attractive couple and you both seem to make each other happy, so I don’t see the problem,” Jim answered. 

“You’re still dancing around, Jim. Do you like her as a person?” 

Jim turned to Blair and said as casually as he could, “I think she’s great. I like her a lot. She reminds me of a person that will treat you well in the years to come, and that’s very important.”

“Holy shit, you do like her. This is great news, Jim. She bought a condo and asked me to move in, what do you think about that? Do you think we’re rushing things?”

Jim looked a little confused for a moment and finally answered, “I think if you’re ready, you’ll know it. This is something you don’t need to ask me. You’ll know when the time is right, Chief.”

“I told her you were behind me all the way and she was jealous. Now she’ll know she doesn’t have to be any longer. Thanks for being my best friend in the world, Jim. I think I’m going to give serious thought to moving in with her. She really is a nice woman and she’s good to me, too. I’ll sleep on it tonight and tell her tomorrow if I’m going to or not. Thanks, again, Jim.”

“You are most welcome, Chief. Like I said, you’ll know when the time is right. It never had anything to do with me.”

Blair stood up from the sofa and smiled at Jim. “You’re absolutely right, man. I do feel like the time is right. It’s not like we won’t ever see each other again, right?”

“Right,” Jim answered. 

“Well, I’m going to get ready for bed. See you tomorrow night. I don’t know when I’m going to have time to cook that meal I promised you, Jim. Perhaps next week or something.”

“Blair, this should be the last thing you worry about anymore. You have a new life starting, put more thought and feelings into that. Don’t worry about me anymore. Okay?”

“See you tomorrow, Jim. Looks like the week I gave you for living here is finally about up. Think how quiet and clean things will be around here from now on. I’m getting almost excited about the move. Not just for me, but for you too. I’m sure it’s been a long almost five years, man.”

Jim stood up and hugged Blair tight and said, “It was the best five years of my life, so don’t ever sell yourself short again.” Jim stood back from Blair and said, “Sleep well. See you tomorrow.” Jim walked up the stairs, but it wasn’t a happy walk and Blair noticed. 

_Alright, what is up with Jim? He seemed almost sad to see me go. Maybe I need to give this a little more thought._

Jim lay down on his bed, fully clothed and never felt like crying so much in his life. He couldn’t believe that Blair would be living somewhere else. He wouldn’t see him like he did now. No more games on television, no more meals cooked for each other and no more just shooting the breeze. If Jim had more nerve, he would have told Blair that he was in love with him, but he could tell that Blair was in love with Melanie, so it was too late to speak up about it. Jim knew that he would see Blair at the station now and then, but things would be different. Jim realized that he was losing the love of his life and a tear slid down his cheek. Jim wiped it off, angrily and rolled on his side. He was going to have to stay in control of himself. He couldn’t lose it in front of Blair or Melanie. Jim listened for Blair’s heartbeat to calm himself down and fell asleep to the calming effect of the sound.

*

Blair fell asleep almost instantly in his room and his last thoughts were of moving out and starting a new life.

*

The next day, Melanie called Blair at the academy at lunch time to ask some questions. “Sandburg.”

“Hi honey, did you have time to talk to Jim last night?” Melanie asked. 

“I not only talked to him, but he almost convinced me to move in with you. He thinks that you’re great for me and he likes you a lot. So, you owe me money, Mel. Remember you said you’d be willing to bet money on how he would react.”

Mel snickered and said, “Well, for once, I’m really glad to find out I’m wrong. So are you going to move in with me soon?”

“I thought in two weeks. That gives me enough time to pack and everything. I want you to understand that this is going to be somewhat hard on me. I’m going to miss Jim like crazy. You’re going to have to be patient. Understood?”

Melanie answered, “I totally understand, Blair. We’ll work it all out. Do you want me to help you pack?”

“Yeah, that would be great, Mel. I don’t get off until six at night, so you could go and see if Jim is there and start packing some of my things. It might be a way to get closer to Jim, too.”

“That sounds like a good idea. What time does Jim get home?”

“About 5:00 every night. So you would have about an hour and a half to do things in my room and start packing things up. If you asked Jim to help, I bet he would,” Blair suggested. 

“I don’t know that Jim would be happy to work side by side with me while we pack up your things. I don’t care what he said, he’s not happy about you moving. I know it.”

“Okay, then just start packing up boxes. Do you have any boxes handy?” Blair asked. 

“I’ll stop at the grocery store and get some on my way over tonight. We’ll see you when you get to the loft. Just think, only two weeks and you’ll be in our new home. One of the bedrooms is a study for you, so that you can do anything you want.”

“Thank you, Mel. This is going to be great. Talk to you soon. I better go finish lunch and get back to classes,” Blair said. 

“Bye, honey.”

“Bye, Mel.”

Mel frowned when she didn’t get a loving name back. She actually hated when Blair called her Mel. That always reminded her of a man’s name and it bugged the hell out of her. But she wasn’t going to bring that up right then. It wasn’t the time or the place. She needed to get busy finding boxes. With any luck, Blair would be able to move out in a week instead of two.

*

Jim was frying some eggs for dinner when there was a knock at the door. He wasn’t thrilled when he realized it was Melanie. Blair wasn’t going to be home for a good hour and a half yet. What in the world did she want with Jim?

Jim shut the stove off and walked over and opened the door. “Hi, Melanie. It’s good to see you.”

“Why did you tell Blair you liked me, when I can see in your eyes, you don’t?”

“I don’t know what you’re talking about, Melanie. I’m happy for Blair. And that means I’m happy for you too,” Jim replied. 

“I have tons of boxes and was going to start packing Blair’s things up. He told me to ask you if you wanted to help me. He thought it might bring us closer together. What do you say?”

“First I’m going to eat. Would you like a fried egg sandwich?” Jim asked. 

“Why Jim, that would be very nice. I do believe you are trying very hard. It must have been hard to give up on your feelings for him. He doesn’t know about them, but I do,” Melanie said. 

“He’s still going to be my best friend, so I don’t know what you mean.”

“You’re only fooling yourself, Jim. You know you’re in love with him. It’s not your fault. He’s a wonderful man, and I don’t blame you for falling in love with him. Everyone loves Blair.”

“Melanie, I’m going to go back to work. I don’t need to listen to this crap. I have no idea what you’re talking about and I would appreciate it if you didn’t mention any of this again,” Jim said, angrily. 

“Now, there is the real, Jim Ellison. What happened to making dinner for me and helping me pack Blair’s things?”

“Fuck you, Melanie. I don’t have to listen to your shit. You’re not welcome in the loft when Blair isn’t here. So don’t come again tomorrow,” Jim said as he stormed out the front door. 

Melanie smiled evilly and was quite proud of the fact that she upset big tough Jim Ellison. He was a pansy and now she was sure of it.

She walked in and started to pack Blair’s things in the two boxes she brought. She worked fast and hard and didn’t hear Blair come in at all. 

Blair tapped on the doorway of his room and said, “Jim wasn’t here?”

“Well, of course he was here, sweetie. He let me in, but he threw a big piss fit and left me to do the packing by myself.”

“What do you mean, he threw a piss fit? What did you say to him?”

“I told him, he might have you fooled, but I knew a man in love with another man when I saw them. He’s in love with you. He asked me to not bring it up again and told me I wasn’t allowed in the loft unless you were here from now on. He was very angry.”

“I can’t believe you said that shit to him, Mel. He’s not into guys. You know nothing about Jim Ellison.”

“I know he’s in love with you and was acting just like the pansy that he is. I can’t believe you don’t see this in his actions,” Melanie stated. 

“Stop calling Jim a pansy. He’s not,” Blair argued. 

“Talk to him tonight and ask him how he feels about you. I bet you he’ll break down and cry. He’s so pathetic.”

“You know what, Melanie? I need to talk to Jim. I need you to go home and just shut up for awhile. I can’t think with all of this being thrown at me at once.”

“Fuck you, Blair. What are you doing? Feeling sorry for the pansy?” Melanie growled. 

“I asked you to stop calling him that. Now, please go home and think about what you’ve done to a good man. I have a lot of thinking to do,” Blair said as calmly as he could. 

“Are you saying, you aren’t moving in with me?”

“What do you think, Melanie? You just got done calling my best friend a pansy because you think he’s in love with me. I don’t appreciate it at all. I’m very angry and I need a lot more time to think on this.”

“I never want to see you again, Blair. It figures that you would choose the fag over me. Why am I not surprised?” Melanie grabbed her purse and stormed out the door, slamming it behind her.

*

Jim sat in the parking lot, listening to what she told Blair, dying from embarrassment. He couldn’t face Blair after all of this. He watched Melanie drive out of the parking lot and knew she didn’t see him, because he was in a really dark spot with no lights on. He was going to spend the night in his truck tonight, it was as simple as that.

*

Blair waited and waited for Jim to come home and finally realized that Jim was probably already in the parking lot and didn’t want to come up. Blair walked down to the dark parking lot with a flash light and found Jim’s truck quickly. He walked over to it and saw Jim sleeping on the front seat. Blair tapped on the window and Jim shot up and banged his head on the window.

“Open up, Jim,” Blair called out through the locked door. 

Jim unlocked it and Blair slid into the truck. “What are you doing down here, Chief?”

“Looking for you. I was worried. Now, I want you to come upstairs so we can discuss this like adults,” Blair suggested. 

“It won’t change anything, Blair.”

“So get up there and we’ll get this talk going,” Blair ordered. 

Jim got out of the truck and walked side by side with Blair all the way up to the loft. The elevator wasn’t working again. Jim was actually glad, because with his luck, they would get stuck in it and Jim couldn’t deal with that. 

Once they got inside the loft, Blair said, “Would you like a beer before the talking commences?”

“Yes, get us both one. I think you’re going to need it,” Jim answered. 

Blair grabbed them each a beer, opened them and walked into the living room. He sat right beside Jim and waited for Jim to start the talk. 

After five minutes, Blair realized that Jim was just going to sit there looking at the floor all night, if he didn’t start the talk himself. So Blair did just that. 

“You’re in love with me, Jim?”

Jim blushed and lowered his head even further. “Yes.”

“When did you think you were going to tell me, on my honeymoon or something?”

“I wasn’t going to tell you, Blair. Some things are better left in the closet, know what I mean?”

“No, I don’t know what you mean. Do you mean you’ve been in love with me for a long while?” Blair asked. 

“About three years. I wasn’t hurting you, was I?” Jim asked pitifully. 

“You kind of were, Jim. Don’t you think I should have been told from the beginning? Don’t you think this is something I would have liked to hear?”

“Blair, I couldn’t tell you I was in love with you. It would have ruined our friendship and I couldn’t live without our friendship. You’re my best friend.”

“Jim, I’ve been in love with you for two years. I never said anything because you didn’t seem to swing that way.”

“What do you mean you’ve been in love with me? Blair, you were dating anyone and everyone. How would I have known?” 

“I didn’t think you swung that way, Jim. So what was I going to do?”

“What about Melanie?” Jim wondered. 

“She’s a bitch and I’m glad I found out now. I thought you really wanted the loft back to yourself. So I didn’t think you even cared that I was moving. I was honestly crushed. Why didn’t we talk before tonight?” Blair asked. 

“I didn’t think it was my place to say anything, Blair. You were thinking of moving in with someone else. What was I supposed to say?” 

“You could have said that my place was here with you. You could have said you loved me. You could have said a hundred things that you didn’t. I would really like to hear you say them now.”

“Blair, your place is here with me, forever. I love you so much that sometimes it hurts and give me a couple days to think up all of the other things I would like to say to you.”

“I’m getting a date out of this. Okay?”

“Would you like to go to Claim Jumper tomorrow night, Blair?”

“Why yes, I would. That’ll be our place, okay?” 

“Everywhere will be our place from now on, Blair. Can I at least kiss you?”

Blair moved closer to Jim and went into his arms and they shared a very dreamy kiss. One that reminded both of them of how stupid they were and what they had missed all this time. When they finally broke away from each other’s lips, both men were smiling big time. 

They were both in a really happy place. 

The end

**Author's Note:**

> Sentinel Thursday #437: Place  
> Word Count: 4,000  
> Warnings: Angst, angst and angst. Happy ending, though.  
> Genre: Pre-slash  
> Rating: M  
> Summary: Blair is dating Ms. Right until she tells Blair that she doesn’t want him to have anything to do with Jim anymore. What will Blair do?


End file.
